When Waiting Seems Unbearable

Ten years ago, I spent Advent waiting for medical test results that would change my life forever. This Advent, I’m waiting for the publication of the book sparked by that diagnosis.

And before I took that test back in 2014? I spent twenty years not knowing what caused my health condition.

I’ve had a lot of practice at waiting, in the health department and in other life areas. I’m sure many of you have as well. And while waiting might become a familiar experience, I don’t think it ever gets easy.

We get impatient. We get discouraged. We lose sight of what we’re waiting for, and why. We insist we’re ready and beg God to hurry … and nothing seems to happen.

Yet we must wait, or give up on what we’re waiting for. But how do we keep waiting when waiting seems hopeless?

Here are three things I’ve learned from my own various seasons of waiting:

Keep doing what you know is right.

We humans like making things happen. When something we want is slow in coming, our first instinct is to force progress. If God declines to give us instructions, we’re tempted to despair or invent our own.

To be clear, we should always seek God’s guidance when we feel lost. Sometimes we hit a dead end because we missed a turn. Or God leads us to an obstacle, then stands ready to show us the way around. In any case, our first response to a roadblock should be to turn to our Guide.

But once we ask for wisdom, God promises to give it (James 1:5–8). So if He responds to your plea for direction with apparent silence, He might want you to keep on as you are. If He gives you an outright “hold on!”, you’ll have to hold on. Until God gives new marching orders, you’ll have to operate on your current ones.

So, when you don’t know what else to do, keep doing what you know is right. Pray. Worship God. Study His Word. Live like Jesus. Love. Serve. Rejoice. Rest. Cultivate healthy relationships. Share the gospel. Do everything for God’s glory.

In a season of waiting, it might feel like you have nothing to do. In reality, there’s always something.

Be honest with God.

Waiting involves a lot of self-control. On top of the temptation to rush off on our own, we must resist the urge to vent our impatience in unhealthy ways.

Sometimes, though, we cross the line from self-control to shutdown. We might think God expects us to squelch our impatience, or to at least restrain our feelings in His presence. After all, we reason, He’s the one making us wait.

But God never asks us to keep any part of our hearts from Him. There’s one outlet for our thoughts and emotions that’s always open: prayer.

God might be making you wait. He might be looking ahead at glorious results that you can’t see. But He cares about your experience here and now. He’s not only preparing your future—He’s living your present with you.

So tell Him all about it. Pour out your fears, doubts, hopes, desires, grief, and frustrations to Him. Ask Him your questions. Seek His comfort, strength, and provision for the waiting.

And once you’ve laid your heart and soul bare to Him …

Keep coming back to the prayer that never fails.

Father Timothy Kavanagh, main character of Jan Karon’s series The Mitford Years, often refers to “the prayer that never fails.” It’s a short, simple prayer for any situation, and it’s one Jesus Himself prayed on the darkest night of His earthly life:

“Thy will be done.”

It’s not a magic formula to earn what we want, any more than waiting is a strategy to force God’s hand. It’s an admission, a surrender, an agreement to live through this wait and accept whatever lies beyond it, with gratitude and faith in the unfailing goodness of the Giver.

Beyond the basics disclosed in the Bible, we don’t know what God’s plan is. Some waits end in weeks or months; some end in decades. Some end beyond this lifetime. How they end, and how we reach that end, are recorded in a book only One has yet read.

So, at the end of the day, at the end of our petitions and protests and pleadings, we can really only say, “Your will be done”—or turn away from God’s will altogether.

In surrendering thus, we follow in the footsteps of a certain Jewish girl from a small Galilean town, who said yes to a commission she couldn’t fully understand, knowing it would cost her, yet also knowing it would bring unfathomable good to the world.

More importantly, we become like the Son she bore, who said yes to a plan He fully understood, that would bring unfathomable good to the world, yet would take millennia to fulfill and would cost Him everything.

Before the world began, God formed a plan for humanity’s salvation, to save us from the sin He knew we’d commit. For thousands of years, He prepared for it and prophesied about it. Then, at the right time, God the Son came among us as a man named Jesus.

He was born of a virgin, lived a sinless life, healed the sick, and taught about the kingdom of God. He died on the cross to atone for our sins, was buried, and on the third day afterward rose again to defeat death. Forty days later, He ascended to heaven, where He intercedes and advocates for those who trust in Him. One day, He’ll return to end sin, suffering, and death forever and usher in a new heaven and earth, where His people will live with Him for eternity.

As a result, anyone who repents of their sins and puts their faith in Jesus as their Lord and Savior receives a full, free, intimate, eternal relationship with God. Their sins are forgiven. God adopts them into His family. God’s Holy Spirit comes to dwell in them, providing everything they need to live a God-honoring life and become more like Christ. And they look forward to resurrection at Christ’s return, and eternity with God.

If you haven’t already put your faith in Jesus, do so now! Confess your sins to God and ask His forgiveness. Believe what Jesus did for you. Ask Jesus to be the Savior of your soul and the Lord of your life.

When you pass through the valley of waiting, remember His example. Remember Him who endured for you—and who’s with you in your waiting.

I am certain that I will see the LORD’s goodness
in the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD;
be strong, and let your heart be courageous.
Wait for the LORD.

Psalm 27:13–14 CSB

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Scripture quotations marked CSB have been taken from the Christian Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2017 by Holman Bible Publishers. Used by permission. Christian Standard Bible® and CSB® are federally registered trademarks of Holman Bible Publishers.